Why I dread the holidays:Don't get me wrong… I am not trying to be anti-Christmas. This could be from my inability to handle too many things at once, especially when it is not by choice. This could possibly have something to do with my ENTP preference, or maybe it's just me. Is it just me?
I don't know what it is about the holidays. It always gets me in a funk. I get overwhelmed, I cannot think clearly, and I want to shut down… disappear from the scene… and come back when it's all over. Is it just me?
I generally love to be around people. I generally love shopping for gifts. I generally love writing emails, cards, and notes to people. I love being with my family. I love getting together with my friends. I love to eat. I love to sing. I generally love to help out whoever is in need.
One caveat: I like doing all those things on my own terms. Without a preplanned schedule. Without the pressure of feeling obligated. With the freedom of knowing that I don't have to do any of it if I choose not to. The pressure comes from my perception that we're expected to do all of the above all at once. And we must remember every single family member, every single friend, every single neighbor, and every single business associate. That's enough to make me want to torch my address book... Is it just me?
I've concluded that my brain has a limit as to how much scheduling and celebrating it can handle. My to-do list is on strike. The wonderful and joyous activities I usually welcome with delight turn into obligations that I dread. It all makes me want to curl up into a fetal position. Is it just me?
I just want to have the choice not to decorate, not to give to yet-another collection for the needy, not to make yet-another care package for the lonely, not to celebrate, not to shop for gifts, not to party, and...well, basically, not to be merry…
IF we had the choice NOT to do them (without feeling like a social misfit), then actually choosing to DO those things would have so much more meaning and be so much more fun…no? Is it just me?
I love the word simplicity. Was it Thoreau who wrote about it? A teen at our church pointed the following scripture verse out to us yesterday. Although that discussion was not about Christmas, I thought the verse was fitting for this post:
They partook of their food with gladness and simplicity and generous hearts... (Acts 2:46)(Amplified)
I know something's not quite right when I would rather sit in front of the computer staring at this endlessly than get back into the holiday frenzy… Is it just me?
Umm… is it over yet?
Richard;
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to thank you for your thoughtful and respectful comment. While I have deleted the post to which it was attached, know that I have considered all you said and agree with you in many pieces. Because I assumed by blog was limited to a small group of friends, I was not careful to edit out several local references or fully explain things that someone in my circle of influence would already recognize.
(who knew I had a national following?!)
Nonetheless, I appreciated your stopping by, your comments, and have enjoyed checking out Mindblink as well. Happy Holidays to you as well, sir!
TOP
TOP, I thank you in turn for your graciousness. I understand from personal experience how disconcerting it can be to be faced with an unexpected torrent of disapproval from strangers. I would not assume that your sudden influx of attention represents an unknown long-standing retinue of silent readers, nor do I think that it will continue. Someone must have stumbled upon your site randomly and called attention to the issue. Some of the remarks may have been overly strident or heavy-handed, and that saddens me because you are clearly a person deserving of respect and encouragement. Good teachers who derive joy from teaching and give it right back again are precious resources. The point was expressed and that should be the end of it. I am very unhappy if the brief storm caused you undue upset. I hope that you have no further negative fallout from it all and that it simply blows over.
ReplyDeleteI cannot apologize for others but I can only once again thank you for your willingness to consider my remarks and also to wish you well.
Richard Wade
I like this post! I decided to do the holidays this year on my own terms, and not feel pressured into doing anything I didn't want to do. The decorating was very minimalist, I didn't do Christmas cards, and only four people got gifts (my mom and my brother's kids--who are the only little ones in my extended-immediate family). Plus, no holiday travel and no holiday baking.
ReplyDeleteBut the point wasn't that I wanted to be a grinch. The point was just that I didn't want to be stressed! And because I was so relaxed, I really did enjoy the events that I did participate in: I went to a great performance of /Messiah/, one of the holiday parties at work, church services, and holiday dinners with close friends. It was such a great holiday!
I realize that because I'm single and have no children, I have a lot more flexibility than most people in choosing how to celebrate the season. I just wanted to share my experience of downsizing the holiday.
Thank you for your comment, Laura! I agree! :)
ReplyDelete