I thought I was very clear on my E/I preference, but I'm finding myself very confused today about the Extraversion/Introversion dichotomy of the MBTI.
This morning, as I sat in the waiting room while getting an oil change, I had a surprising discovery about myself.
When I walked into the room, there were about four other people in the room silently watching a morning show on TV. I found a seat as far away from the others as I could and proceeded to read a book I had brought. With some effort, I was able to block out the sounds from the TV so I could concentrate on my reading.
Then after about 10 minutes, a middle-aged woman in the room decided to make a comment about something that was said on TV, and two of the men responded by saying, "yes, I agree," and "me too," respectively. That opened the flood gates. For the next hour or so, the rest of the waiting room learned all about this woman's life and her views. I don't remember any details, as I was silently screaming "shut the hell up" in my head the whole time, never looking up from my book.
There were people walking in and out, the door opening and closing, the TV blaring, and this woman talking loudly in her annoying voice about her opinions on things...endlessly... It probably seemed more chaotic to me than it really was in reality. I usually pride myself in my level of patience and understanding. This morning was different. I almost had an anxiety attack and was on the verge of taking action I may have lived to regret when the service guy walked in and called my name. God made the word "Hallelujah" for occasions like these...
It is possible that this could just be an isolated incident. However, I thought about it at length and realized that most of the time, I would rather not talk to strangers. When it happens, I do end up enjoying talking to them. But generally, I prefer keeping to myself. I love conversation, but only in intimate settings. Even with close friends, I feel drained if I am around more than two or three at a time. Now that I am thinking about it, I realize this has always been the case. Why did it not become clear to me until today?? Had I been in denial because of my unrealistic expectation of myself to always be the bubbly, outgoing, social butterfly?
There are five E/I facets in the MBTI Step II (Form Q). I am way over to the Extraverted side in only two of the five: Expressive/Contained and Enthusiastic/Quiet. I am midzone in Initiating/Receiving and Gregarious/Intimate and slightly on the Introverted side in Active/Reflective.
I'm beginning to think I'm increasingly inching my way to the "I" side. Hmm...
Are you inching your way towards "I", or gaining greater understanding of how you may have always leaned "I"-wards?
ReplyDeleteI have asked myself many times, as I have been wondering about my T/F split. Am I changing, or becoming more aware of something in me?
MBTI Step II really cleared things up, though I haven't done the actual test. I'm pretty sure it will tell me that I'm very strongly F on these: Accomodating (not Questioning), Accepting (not Critical), Tender (not Tough). I am also pretty sure I'm quite T on these: Logical (more than Empathic) and Reasonable (more than Compassionate), though these are probably closer to midzone than the first three F-side ones I mentioned.
Does this make me an F, or is the very fact that I'm analyzing it so much make me a T? I think when it comes down to it, it's more accurate for me to claim I'm INxP, because I really feel like I'm a cross of both.
And doesn't that last sentence betray my tendency to balance the T and F aspects in my decision-making? :P
I also have a few Extrovert tendencies, but have always been quite sure I'm mostly Introverted. Those aspects were much easier for me to understand, but I completely sympathize about how weird it is to be confused about a type that seems to be pretty straightforward!
Hi Qrystal!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad I'm not the only one who struggle and teeter between the preferences. I also often get confused between the T and the F, although I still think that I have stronger T traits. They were not kidding when they said that type development is a life-long process! :-)
Have you looked into Enneagram? It explains this quite well.
ReplyDeleteThere are three instinctual subtypes for each of the 9 types - sexual, social and self-preservation.
You seem to me as a sexual subtype as I am. We are more interested into deep one-on-one intimate realtionships. It is not very motivating for me to have conversations that are superfical and don't lead to getting things done (my DiSC profile labels me as a "result-oriented"), don't improve my understanding how things work (INTP side of me) or don't bring new ideas (ENTP at last).
:)
Wow, Radek! You seem to know yourself pretty well!
ReplyDeleteHmm... you're right. Your description does seem to fit me as well. I have never taken the Enneagram or the DiSC, but I have taken the Personality Code test which is based on the DiSC.
I'm sure I will take all of the above at some point during my studies. :)
Thanks for the comment!