The Evil Twin

Breanne recently wrote about her “in the grip” experience when she was out of town. When I read the words, I thought that was a very cool phrase - in the grip... I wanted to be “in the grip” as well, until I found out that it’s not all that fun to be there… :-(

It is an MBTI phrase that describes our out-of-character selves that seem to emerge when we’re stressed or fatigued. It sneaks up on us and "grips" us, thus the term (I'm assuming). In those moments, we feel out of control and strangely “not ourselves.” I’ve always wondered, “Well, is that the real me?” …the me that comes out when I become lax in my self-control? …the person that I have to warn people about with “oh, you haven’t seen the other side of me…” This happens especially when I have been ignored or dismissed. I can go into a deep depression and/or get obsessed with trying to remedy their misconception of my competency (which usually makes it worse). This “monster in the closet” can escape at any given moment, and I have been known to become irrational and lash out at the ones I love and trust the most. This was my secret shame, which I thought was my character flaw that I somehow had to pray away. *sigh*

Okay, I am eggggs…aggerating a bit. It doesn't get that bad (anymore...well, not too often). But let me tell you, it was an eye-opening experience for me to find out about the “in the grip” concept.

I am an ENTP. According to the Jungian theory, my dominant function is Extraverted iNtuition (Ne). My inferior function is Introverted Sensing (Si).

In the book "In The Grip, Understanding Type Stress, and the Inferior Function," published by CPP, the energizers and stressors for ENTP/ENFP are listed as follows:

Energizers: variety and challenge; autonomy in accomplishing tasks; being taken seriously – valued for competence and special skills; freedom to create innovative and effective solutions to problems; permission to delegate implementation of solutions to others; adequate unstructured time

Stressors: having to reach closure too soon; being disrespected – competency doubted; overloaded with details; supervision that is too close and communicates distrust and doubt; too little outside stimulation – too little excitement about projects; rules that inhibit the creative process and drain energy

What comes out as a positive dominant function (Si) in an ISTJ (my husband) or ISFJ (my daughter) as:

solitude and reflection; attention to facts and details; awareness of internal experience

can come out as an inferior function in me as:

withdrawal/depression; obsessiveness; and focus on the body.

I think by “focus on the body," they mean hypochondria. It must be a faux pas to say that, though(?) But I can say it. Ha!, especially since it’s about me. Why must we use an ambiguous phrase and use up a whole paragraph to explain what that means, when one word does the job perfectly??

Coincidentally, just this past Sunday, I skipped church (very unusual for me), didn’t want to see anyone (again, extremely unusual), spent hours fine-tuning my business brochure (which doesn’t look much different after all that), and was convinced that a persistent cramp in my side was cancer.

You can’t make this stuff up!

In all seriousness, though, the information is fascinating and a great tool to understand ourselves better and also get some insight into how to support our loved ones when they are stressed and fall into the “grip” of their inferior functions.