Although people often use fear to protect themselves from achieving the success that they want, it's important to remember that you were born with only two basic fears: 1) the fear of falling and, 2) the fear of loud noises. All of the other fears that you have (e.g. fear of failing) have been learned and nurtured. Your deep-rooted belief in their reality literally attracts the circumstances and conditions that will allow you to continue to support your belief in their validity. Once again, when you change your beliefs, you will change the realities that you attract.
However, we live in an uncertain world and things happen with startling randomness. As a mature adult, you need to come to terms with the harsh reality that there are no absolute guarantees for any of us. Complete certitude and risk-free living is impossible. In short, you could be doing everything right, and still get hurt. However, by becoming more willing to live that risk that life is, you'll begin to embrace it more on its terms instead of expecting that life is always going to align itself with you. But what would you rather life: a risk-free life or an authentically human one? Remember that the bumps in the road are a part of the road, too. Best advice: fully acknowledge and embrace your fears...and then have the courage to go ahead and do it anyway.
Remember that if you truly want to change your life, you must take action. It's much easier to change what you're doing than it is to change what you're thinking and how you're feeling. However, a lot of people avoid taking action to change their circumstances until they "feel better." Paradoxically, it's really the opposite. Most people will begin to feel better as soon as they find the courage to take action.
I don't think that people have "problems." By labeling what shows up for you as problematic, you infer that what's present for you is, somehow, wrong or bad. However, that stance puts you at war with "what is" because whenever you argue with reality, you're going to lose. I do, however, believe that all of us have "challenges" that need to be appropriately addressed. The question that we ask ourselves about what's showin gup for us actually determine how we're going to be experiencing these situations. If you start to think, for example, "Why is this happening to me?" your inner mind is compelled to come up with reasons to justify why things are painfully unfolding like they are. However, such a question only invites your inner mind to disempower itself through discounts and self-imposed victimization. Some better questions might be: "How can I use this experience to grow? What is life trying to teach me right now? What's the lesson here?" And don't be afraid to sit in the center of your personal chaos for a while and just "not-know." Paradoxically, breakdowns often precede breakthroughs.
Coming up: The sixth and last part.
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